All Hands On Deck

In the summer of 2007, we made a decision to move, and went on to decide to move to my home town. We loved living in the town we lived in, but we had certainly outgrown our house. But more pressing was my desire for my kids to get to know their grandmother more. I have wonderful memories of living near my grandparents, and wanted my children to have some of these same opportunities. My mother-in-law lived in North Carolina and we weren't about to move down there. I knew my mom was getting wary of the drive across town to visit us. I also had suspicions that Mom might need some of our help. She had been looking tired, and had recently disclosed that she had emphysema in a very casual conversation to me one day that knocked my socks off. I couldn't believe she had known and hadn't told me right away. I called my siblings who sort of knew something was going on. That's Mom. So off to my hometown we moved and began our journey.

Seasons came and went and finally summer had arrived. We had lost of fun getting used to our new neighborhood; collecting polliwogs from a catch basin and enjoying walks around the wooded block.

My Mom called an "all hands on deck" meeting at her house one evening. This can't be good, I thought. We all knew something was up and made idle chatter about our comings and goings with one another. Finally, Mom broke the chatter to tell us her news.

She had waited until my niece J had her wedding to deliver the information so we all could enjoy the wedding. She had been to her family doctor. She had cold-like symptoms for awhile, they had done a chest x-ray- saw something, and the dcotor had made the call to do a PET scan. Mom said "the PET scan showed activity." We all sat in silence around the table. That was it. No other information other than to say she had an appointment with a "lung doctor".

I went home. I knew what a PET scan was, but I wasn't sure if anyone else did. Did my mother know and was she just using gentler terms to describe what was going on for our sakes? I called my sister, and asked if she knew what a PET scan was. She told me she had just googled it, and yes she knew. I asked her if she though Mom knew. She wasn't sure.

A PET scan is not an official diagnosis tool - it is a screener. It indicates masses and metabolic activity. Anyone who knows anything about cancer knows what a PET scan is. And they know also that it might as well be a diagnosis tool. But alas, only a biopsy can tell "for sure". If I was a betting man - I would guess the need to verify through a biopsy is more for liability/insurance sake than it is for the medical practitioner to know if it was benign or malignant.

So off to the pulmonologist Dr. F. As they ran some preliminary tests, the nurse practitioner walked in. She asked Mom a series of questions. She asked about Mom's previous tests. This is when it hit - Mom asked the nurse what a PET scan was and what "activity" meant. My heart sank. She didn't know. I watched the nurse looking down at her paperwork briefly stop writing to field Mom's question. She realized too that Mom didn't know what was going on. The nurse gave some technical answer and then told Mom that the doctor would go over her results with her. What a punt, but I can't say as I blame her.

The doctor came in and gave the likely diagnosis, and also indicated what next steps we need to do- mostly a biopsy to confirm his suspicions. Thus began the whirlwind of activity that would encompass our family for the next few months.