Coming at me from all sides

I've decided that the journey of life is difficult no matter who you are. I think even those beautiful people celebrities have their hardships, the a$$hole CEO's who make way too much money and all at the regular Joe's expense, well I'm sure they have a struggle or two. After all, money and fame are not what makes you happy. It's cliche, and certainly counterculture but very true, and I have always felt that way.

So, Zach, my beautiful baby boy is in speech therapy twice a week, and now they are pushing occupational therapy. Good grief. He screams the whole time his speech pathologist is over, and thus he needs OT?

The pediatrician recommended my daughter go for an OT eval because she is behind the milestone for a 4 year old to draw a stick figure. So what does the school district do? An evaluation by a special ed teacher, a speech pathologist, and a psychologist. Huh? Man, I think I have found the latest way to line your pockets boys and girls. This is far beyond what she needs - and note: there is no OT eval!?!! Inefficiencies up the wazoo..

I broke my toe last week. It is still bruised and I cannot put any weight on it. So what does everyone say to me? "You should go to the doctor." So he can do what? Take an X-ray and confirm my diagnosis only to tell me to take pain killers if it bothers me, stay off of it for awhile and take note of any significant changes?

And I am just not visiting doctor's offices enough right now - two kids who had coxsackie, Steve's grandma who was ill and subsequently passed in July, and now my mother with lung cancer. I am tired of appointments, especially when they are not scheduled according to your schedule.

"The therapist only sees anyone at 3 pm on Thursdays". How flexible of her. None of these people would make it in the work world that I come from. How do things get done when everything is so rigid?

And maybe another post, I can discuss the great babysitter/nanny hunt.

All Hands On Deck

In the summer of 2007, we made a decision to move, and went on to decide to move to my home town. We loved living in the town we lived in, but we had certainly outgrown our house. But more pressing was my desire for my kids to get to know their grandmother more. I have wonderful memories of living near my grandparents, and wanted my children to have some of these same opportunities. My mother-in-law lived in North Carolina and we weren't about to move down there. I knew my mom was getting wary of the drive across town to visit us. I also had suspicions that Mom might need some of our help. She had been looking tired, and had recently disclosed that she had emphysema in a very casual conversation to me one day that knocked my socks off. I couldn't believe she had known and hadn't told me right away. I called my siblings who sort of knew something was going on. That's Mom. So off to my hometown we moved and began our journey.

Seasons came and went and finally summer had arrived. We had lost of fun getting used to our new neighborhood; collecting polliwogs from a catch basin and enjoying walks around the wooded block.

My Mom called an "all hands on deck" meeting at her house one evening. This can't be good, I thought. We all knew something was up and made idle chatter about our comings and goings with one another. Finally, Mom broke the chatter to tell us her news.

She had waited until my niece J had her wedding to deliver the information so we all could enjoy the wedding. She had been to her family doctor. She had cold-like symptoms for awhile, they had done a chest x-ray- saw something, and the dcotor had made the call to do a PET scan. Mom said "the PET scan showed activity." We all sat in silence around the table. That was it. No other information other than to say she had an appointment with a "lung doctor".

I went home. I knew what a PET scan was, but I wasn't sure if anyone else did. Did my mother know and was she just using gentler terms to describe what was going on for our sakes? I called my sister, and asked if she knew what a PET scan was. She told me she had just googled it, and yes she knew. I asked her if she though Mom knew. She wasn't sure.

A PET scan is not an official diagnosis tool - it is a screener. It indicates masses and metabolic activity. Anyone who knows anything about cancer knows what a PET scan is. And they know also that it might as well be a diagnosis tool. But alas, only a biopsy can tell "for sure". If I was a betting man - I would guess the need to verify through a biopsy is more for liability/insurance sake than it is for the medical practitioner to know if it was benign or malignant.

So off to the pulmonologist Dr. F. As they ran some preliminary tests, the nurse practitioner walked in. She asked Mom a series of questions. She asked about Mom's previous tests. This is when it hit - Mom asked the nurse what a PET scan was and what "activity" meant. My heart sank. She didn't know. I watched the nurse looking down at her paperwork briefly stop writing to field Mom's question. She realized too that Mom didn't know what was going on. The nurse gave some technical answer and then told Mom that the doctor would go over her results with her. What a punt, but I can't say as I blame her.

The doctor came in and gave the likely diagnosis, and also indicated what next steps we need to do- mostly a biopsy to confirm his suspicions. Thus began the whirlwind of activity that would encompass our family for the next few months.

Goodbye Grandma Helen

Steve's grandmother, 97 at the time, had taken a stumble at her apartment and ended up in the hospital. Thus began her gradual descent. Steve's mom being in North Carolina couldn't tell what was going on with Grandma - so off we went to Rochester and continued to check on a series of falls, hospital visits, nursing home episodes, and her eventual death. Grandma Helen was a terrific woman - and I was so glad to meet someone like her. She did not take life for granted. I remembered the times she would call when Sophie was an infant, she would call and check in on what was new with Sophie. I was always amazed at how much she remembered of child development and milestones. She was so hard working! Only at the very end did I ever see her feel sorry for herself - and even then, she would self correct and say that others were less fortunate than herself. She was not afraid of death. She was afraid of losing her memory and wrote me a note saying as much. She was a woman of terrific faith and led a life like more people should. It was hard running out to Rochester frequently to see what was up - but I only wish we would have done it more. She deserved a lot more than we could give her.

God Bless you Grandma. We love you and won't forget your lessons in how to live a life.

Zach’s 1 year - 1 month late

Trying to get on the computer lately is so very very difficult. Zach has a proclivity to grabbing the mouse and keyboard every time I make an attempt to get near one.

Zach is doing well. He had his first year check up but didn't receive all his immunizations because they discovered a small ear infection upon his exam. The poor little bugger didn't give any indication. So Zach has had a first- his first antibiotics that is.

He weighs 21 pounds, 8 ounces and is 30 ¾ inches long. He is at 35% for weight, 85% for height, and 95% for head circumference. My little bobble-head Zach.

He is walking like a champ now! He started not quite 2 weeks after his first birthday. He had a gradual development; first he took a few steps, then a few more, then after about 2 weeks he was pretty much up and going. It’s always so impressive how they learn to do this.

Zach is pretty much hairless (not really but sort of) and holding at 10 teeth. He is using every tooth he has though; a pretty decent eater, albeit not a big one. He likes broccoli and carrots, chicken and cheese, and is terrific drinking juice out of a juice box, something Sophie didn't master until 2.

His talking is limited, although he loves to yell “sit” and point at the dog. He has quit uttering Mama and Dada but does manage a “woof woof” at Buddy. Obviously, this kid loves dogs. And he really does. He also loves teeth. He loves to grab Buddy’s teeth (YIKES), my teeth, anyone who will open up their mouth long enough for him to reach in. Watch out Grandma for those dentures! I think we should have named him Herbie (bizarre reference to the upcoming Rudolph special) - this boy may be a dentist. Fairly lucrative career from what I understand.

His personality is as good-natured as always. The kid is a lot of fun- he just doesn't sleep worth a darn. Uugghh. The kid sleeps 9 hours a day which may seem a lot to some but by the time I get him down to bed, then Sophie down to bed, then clean up the house, spin down, and get myself to bed a good chunk of those 9 hours is gone.

Zach had a terrific first birthday party, even had a moon bouncer. Unfortunately, we had just moved into our new house a week or so prior and the camera was MIA not to be found until a few weeks later so I don't have much in the way of pictures. He was a very cute Tigger for Halloween but wasn't much for the going door to door unlike sister Sophie who ate it up.

In some further good news: it looks as if we sold our old house. Closing is tentatively scheduled for December 15^th so please say a prayer for smooth sailing.

The holidays are upon us so we look forward to them. May you all have a wonderful holiday season.

Edition number 11 for Zach's first year newsletter

Zach is now 11 months and up to no good! :)

He is crawling and then some now. He tends to crawl without using his knees - makes him look like a 4 legged spider. He does this rather quickly I tell you. He can go up the stairs at pretty much lightening speed, but still has to figure out how to negotiate his way down.

Big news for this time period is that Zach is standing on his own, unassisted, and without pulling up on anything. It is so fun to go to the park, put him on the ground, watch him crawl around, and in the middle of nowhere, he just stands up with his hands outstretched like a surfer riding a wave. So cute - and do you think I can capture a picture of this? Of course not.

He is eating everything now, pasta, rice, meatballs, pulled pork (loved it), veggies and fruits. Nothing he hates - although I have noticed a tendency to go for the sweets. (Dear sister always seemed to like the salty...)

Zach still has Steven's hairline - but Steve tends to think that with his genetics, it's probably good that he doesn't get too attached to the hair he will get.

He says Dada, Mama and tickle and a lot of gibberish that sounds like he is trying to take part in our conversations. It can be very amusing. When he hears sister Sophie start a rant (which she happens to do often....) he puts on his own little show and it sounds like a the McLaughlin Group guest starring Pat Buchanan has come to the Morphet household. I look forward to the spirited conversations that will one day take place...

We managed a trip to Massachusetts and the kids did great. We snuck in a trip to the a contemporary art musuem called Mass MoCA (http://www.massmoca.org/) always a good time. One of everybody's favorite pieces? "7 melting snowflakes" "A "white" drawing documenting the almost imperceptible traces of melting snowflakes". Imperceptible YUP.

Tanglewood was another story. We rushed to get there and grabbed dinner there - Mom noted it was a bit on the pricey side for the fare we received. After a large bottle on a rather warm evening, Zach decided to hurl on Grandma Boulware just minutes before the start of the concert. Did I mention he did this at least 3 times and had her covered from the shoulders on down. YUCK! Off Steve ran to the gift shop to buy an overpriced T-shirt in an effort to ward off the funk. As Mom freshened up a bit (in a public restroom), Steve announced to the rest of us: "Dinner at the park: $45, T-shirt at the gift shop: $22, watching Babcia getting hurled on - PRICELESS." We cracked up.

Our trip to the NY State Fair was a lot more tame - Zach and Sophie loved it!

We are asking for your prayers that we quickly sell our current home, especially now that we have closed on our new house just yesterday. (HURRAY!!!)

That's it for now - next month is the big 1 year. We are planning a party Sunday October 7 - further details to come. We would love for you all to join us in our new house! (Even if we haven't moved in yet...)

Zach is 10 months and Sophie is 3!

Hi everybody:

Just a little update on our family.

Zach turned 10 months and is now crawling. HURRAY! He is also standing on his own, and wanting to walk with assistance everywhere. (It's tough being tall sometimes - my back is killing me.)

He is eating like a champ - loves baby food of all sorts, yogurt, pasta, blueberries, DILL PICKLES and SAUERKRAUT (?!?!). I am thinking he definitely is showing his Polish genes. He is taking a bottle real well now (finally) and holds it by himself for the most part.

He is saying dada, and mama, and baba, and this, but I think he is only getting the Mama part for now.

Don't ask about the sleeping - it aint been pretty.

As for Ms. Sophie - she is 3 and officially potty trained. We aren't at 100% yet - but we are getting there. Unfortunately, Sophie was running a 104.5 degree temperature on her actual birthday so we had to cancel her official kid party - but alas we were able to share her Uncle Robby's party and her Babcia Morphet was able to attend all the way up from N. Carolina. As for what she is up to: She knows her letters pretty well, can spell STOP and SOPHIA 50% of the time, and is a total musician - great pitch and interest. She's been counting for awhile and recognizes numbers 1-11. She knows her numbers in Spanish too. (Thank you Dora) She loves Elmo, Dora, Nemo, Veggie Tales (especially Larry Boy). We are getting into some Leap Frog products right now and she really enjoys them.

So if you are wondering why this email is so late - well, Zach and Sophie have both been ill recently (3 solid weeks of high temps and nausea). And we are about to put our home on the market (for sale by owner - I know, I know - are we nuts - but check out the website http://infotube.net/180909) and the good news - we are moving in September! We purchased a house out in Camillus and should be closing in early September. YEAH! Housewarming party/ Zach's first birthday party is expected to be at the new residence October 7 - so mark it on your calendars.

Zach has been so sick that I have few pictures to share. I'll attach a few and lets hope I can get him feeling better and back to his old smiley self.

Zach is nine months~!

Hi All!

Welcome to the latest edition of Zach's first year where we are officially done with 75% of it!

Yup he turned 9 months.

Zach is able to sit up on his own now. However, he is STILL not crawling. Doctor said that all appears well - his reflexes and muscle tone are fine, and he is interactive, and mobile in other ways - so they are not at all concerned. It DID make our vacation easier not having to watch him like a hawk.

And vacation was a week out at Sylvan Beach with Aunt Cathy and Uncle Mark and cousins Natalie and Ben. (woo hoo - we really know how to live it up!) We had a visit from Aunt Melanie and cousin Megan too. Zach loved the water when it was calm - but on windy days when those waves started coming - he was a little less thrilled. But nothing can beat squishing your toes in that sand so he had a blast even on windy days.

He is officially up to 5 teeth with that sixth tooth giving him a heck of a time (and thus Zach giving us a heck of a time.) He is eating lots of finger foods, pastas, cheese, bagels, blueberries, and PICKLES! Yes - he loves dill pickles which we found out on vacation.

He says Mama, Dada, baba, that, and hisses like a goose when you get too close.

He is weighing 19 pounds 7 ounces, and meaures 28.5 inches long. That puts him in the 50% height, 25% weight, and 80% head circumference. Gotta love the Morphet melon.

We are in the process of possibly getting a new house - so wish us luck!